TRYING TO TRY

“What is this life if full of care,
We have no time to stand & stare.”—William H.Davies.
        
These were the starting lines to be spoken by me for the paper reading topic when I was in class 3. At that time, the topic was prepared for me by my papa who very well knew what he was compiling & I just did the rote learning & gave my speech on stage…without knowing what I am speaking.

I didn’t know why but since then till now,these lines were there in my sub conscious mind all the time..( I am 40 years old now) & I always wanted to recall these words somewhere in my life to feel its importance & share with others although everybody might have read these lines in their lives one or the other time.

And while I always wanted to pen down something my whole life & now when I am  writing, these lines were the first thing to come to my mind..WHY.??? The answer very well lies in all our lives–our lifestyle,luxuries becoming necessities, happiness quotient, fast & furious pace of life, tech savvy environment and much more…the list is endless..Where it will lead us all,only GOD knows.

But one thing which I have come to know is that we really don’t have the time to just stand still for a moment & visualize the beauty of anything nearby us– be it the beauty of relationships,be it the growing of a child.. passing through different phases, your own holistic growth, etc., we really are deprived of such things…,as priority is assigned to other unimportant things.. so realizing the beauty of nature or any external thing takes a back seat.And by the time, all of us realize what we really want and how to fulfill or accomplish it, it’ s too late.

       Quoting my life’ s example only—I am  a  mother of two energetic sons–  elder one being 4 1/2 years & the younger one 18 months old…& only I know how I cry sometimes when I realize that I am not able to spend ‘ THE QUALITY TIME ‘ with my kids ,play with them,cry with them, sing & dance with them, do mad & childlike acts like them…but I can’t ..maybe it’s the hectic pace of life after having 2 kids—fulfill their primary needs, imbibing & implementing some moral values in them, taking full care of them with some mishappenings here & there…..but I literally want to cherish the time with their unconditional & selfless love in this selfish, materialistic and money minded world.

      I am not letting any stone unturned in order to spend more & more time with them and TRYING TO TRY each & everything with them…but still some voice inside me keeps on saying that–something is missing…!!

I want to do so many things with them but while fulfilling the routine chores & obliging different formalities….just wondered how my kids have grown up from infant to toddler to child….& when to adolescent and a collegiate..u won’t realize..time will just fly….My life has become so monotonous as same work has to be done everyday,fast paced as my in-laws are quick & fast…so I’ ve also to be (otherwise I was a laid back & relaxed person..) ,no time for my hobbies or other interests to pursue. But Thanks to the kids… as with them, life is much more colorful & vibrant and thanks to them for making me see the beauty & goodness of things around me to some extent..if not to a large extent.

                Though I have become a slave of the clock, still I manage to sqeeze some time  here and there to be with my world- my kids….& I will keep on TRYING TO TRY….thanks to my mumma papa for making me so strong, self reliant & patient..and above all, recalling their upbringing …how they give importance & priority to their children….keeps on giving u the momentum & strength for bringing up ur own children…GOD bless all the awesome , wonderful,amazing SUPERwomen, SUPERmummas, SUPERwives, SUPERRR….se uparrrr…homemakers…HATS OFF to you all.!!!!